Honey, I Shrunk the Kids Again
by Gareth Owen Jones
Summary: As you may have guessed, this is a sequel to 'Honey, I Shrunk The Kids' written in script format. Read and Enjoy !


HONEY, I SHRUNK THE KIDS - AGAIN! 

Scene 1;Outside the Szalinski's house [The postman passes and presses a button on the Szalinski mailbox. The mailbox doesn't open, and the mailman gets very frustrated - he then goes up to the front door, and knocks. Diane Szalinski answers] 

DIANEHello ? MAILMANHi, DIANEAnd who may you be ? MAILMANErm…I'm your mailman. DIANEOh, hi. Do you need us to sign anything ? MAILMANNo. DIANEDo you have something you need us to keep for next door while they're on holiday ? MAILMANNo. DIANEThen, what do you need ? MAILMANNothing. It's just that your mailbox doesn't work. DIANEOh. I'm sorry about that. 

[He gives her the mail] 

MAILMANHave a nice day. DIANESure. [Closes the door]. MAILMAN[To himself, in disbelief as he walks away] Your mailbox doesn't work ?! 

Cut to; [Inside the Szalinski house. Diane has just closed the door and walks into the kitchen] 

DIANE[Shouting] Wayne. The mailbox doesn't work. WAYNE[Entering the kitchen] I'll fix it later, Honey. DIANESo, have you decided which inventions you're taking to this meeting tomorrow. WAYNEFirst of all it is not a meeting, it's a thing where you do stuff and show stuff. DIANEYou just described a Circus. WAYNEIt's kind of like the science fairs we used to take Nick to. Although there are other things apart from scientific inventions on display. Isn't it a pity Adam isn't more scientifically experimental like Nick was ? DIANEWayne, honey. Nick and Adam are nothing alike. Don't you think... WAYNEAnd secondly, No. I haven't decided which inventions I should take. I don't really want to go. DIANEYou will go. WAYNEWhy ? DIANEBecause I said so. And you need to decide which inventions you're taking. This circus-type thing is tomorrow. WAYNEYeah, but I have so many good inventions. DIANESome that don't work. WAYNESure there are some that don't work, but there's nothing wrong with that. DIANEAre you taking the shrink ray. WAYNEI'm not sure. DIANEIsn't that why you brought it home from the smith-sonium for the weekend ? WAYNENo. I brought it home to fix it. They've been having some problems. The laser density is... DIANEWayne, I don't want a scientific explanation. 'It doesn't work right' would be fine. 

[Adam enters. He is already dressed and looks as if he is ready to go out to play baseball.] 

DIANEAdam honey, isn't it a bit early to be playing baseball ? ADAMWe're all going out to finish yesterday's game. DIANEThis early ? ADAMYou're the one who told me to be home for when Amy and Russ get here. DIANEOh of course. Amy and Russ are coming down for the weekend. WAYNEYou didn't tell me. DIANEI'm sorry honey, but I forgot myself. There's no problem, is there ? WAYNE[Guilty] No. DIANEWayne... WAYNEIt's just that...I invited Nick here. DIANEWhat ?! Why do you never think of telling me ?! ADAMCan I...erm...go now ? WAYNESure. DIANEWayne. I am waiting for an answer. 

[Adam exits, avoiding Wayne and Diane - she keeps shouting at Wayne] 

Scene 2;Later that day in the Szalinski living room 

[Diane is watching Tv, and Wayne is working on a small invention. Adam enters] 

DIANEAnd where have you been, young man ? ADAMPlaying baseball, I've already told you. Aren't they here yet ?! DIANENo. Neither Nick nor Amy and Russ. WAYNEDon't worry, honey. They will be here soon. DIANEAdam, go and change out of your play-clothes. ADAMBut mom... DIANEAdam. WAYNEAdam, son, I think you'd better do as your mom tells you. Nick would have straight away. ADAMStop comparing me to Nick, dad. We're two different people. 

[Adam exits upstairs quite upset. Diane looks at him, worrying] 

WAYNEWhat was that all about ?! DIANEWayne, I think we need to talk about Adam. You keep comparing him... 

[The doorbell rings] 

WAYNEI'll get it. DIANEAnd he's gone again. 

[Wayne goes to answer the door. Diane follows him. Wayne opens the door - Amy, Russ Thompson and Nick are stood there with cases] 

DIANEAmy, Nicky ! NICKSo you're still calling me Nicky. DIANEYou're still my little boy, Nick. AMYHi, mom. 

[They start hugging] 

DIANE[Shouts up the stairs] Adam, it's your brother and your sister with her boyfriend ! WAYNEHey Russ. How are both of you keeping. RUSSWe're great, Mr. Szalinski. AMYWe're fine, dad. Don't worry. NICKHey Dad. WAYNENicky. My number one son ! 

[Adam arrives at the bottom of the stairs just in time to hear this. He looks disappointed and starts running back up] 

DIANEAdam, honey. WAYNEHey Adam, it's just something I say. I didn't mean it like that. ADAMReally ? WAYNESure. You're both my sons. 

[Adam walks back down the stairs gladly] 

ADAMHey Amy, Nick. WAYNESo Nick. I'm working on this new invention... 

[As Wayne starts walking Nick through to the living room, Adam looks a bit disappointed] 

AMY[To Adam] Don't sweat. At least you're into cool stuff like baseball and music. ADAMYeah. DIANESo, come through. 

[They all grab a suitcase, and walk to join Nick and Wayne in the living room] 

DIANESo, why are all of you arriving together ? RUSSWell we we're going quite close to Nick's college dorm. And since we were all coming here, we decided to pick him up on the way. AMYWe weren't sure if you had room for all of us. WAYNEOf course we do. DIANEAdam, show them to their rooms. ADAMSure. Come on you guys. 

[Ad. Lib talking] 

[Adam takes the others upstairs - leaving Wayne and Diane alone] 

DIANEWayne, try to take more notice of Adam even though Nick and Amy...even though Nick is here. WAYNESure honey. Now what are we having for dinner tonight. DIANE[Sigh] I don't know. Just a take away or something I guess. WAYNEYou know, I still don't want to go to this thing tomorrow... 

[Ad. Lib talking] 

[Between both scenes, zoom into a window as Wayne and Diane exit. Show it getting darker, and then lighter again (and the moon etc.)] 

Scene 3The morning after - Outside the Szalinski house 

[The mailman knocks on the door with mail in his hand] DIANE[Opening the door] Hello ? Oh, hello. MAILMANHello again. I'm... DIANEWe were introduced yesterday. MAILMANOf course. Erm...Your mailbox isn't working again. DIANEAgain ?! I though Wayne fixed it. I'm sorry. [Closes the door] MAILMAN[Stopping the door from closing] Here's your mail. DIANEOf course. Thanks. 

[She takes the mail and enters the house] 

MAILMAN[To himself] I need another job. Or another neighborhood. 

Cut to;The inside of the house 

[Diane walks through to the kitchen] 

DIANE[Shouting] Wayne, the mailbox isn't working again. WAYNE[Voice] Sure thing, honey. 

[Diane starts making breakfast using some weird gadgets. Adam enters while Diane is just about to pour some milk] 

ADAMMom, did you know that there are ten million bacteria in a litre of milk ? DIANEHow do you know that honey ? [Puts the milk carton in the bin] ADAMNick told me yesterday. DIANENick. Of course. Where's your father ? [She starts eating her cereal dry] ADAM[Looks at Diane in amazement] I don't know. I haven't seen him this morning. Maybe he's gone to work early. DIANEOr maybe he's still asleep. WAYNE! 

[Amy enters. Looking very tired - still in her pyjamas] 

AMYGee, mom. What's all the noise about ? DIANEI'm sorry honey, did I wake you ? AMYWell, actually yes. DIANEWAYNE!!! ADAMI don't know what's up with her. AMYShe's probably hung up about having to go to gran and granddad's party tonight. DIANEThat's tonight ? I wasn't even thinking about that! WAYNE!!!!!!! WAYNE[Voice] Sure thing, dear. DIANEWell at least he's up. AMYMom, I've only been home a week, and I can smell that rat before you. ADAMYeah Mom, don't you think you should go and wake dad up ? DIANEBut he's already… AMYJust check. DIANEWhy ? ADAMDAD! WAYNE [Voice] Sure thing dear. AMYHOW ARE YOU, DAD ? WAYNE[Voice] Sure thing, dear. DIANEThe scheming…[Runs up the stairs] AMYWe told her so. ADAMYeah. 

DIANE[Voice] WAYNE!!! WAYNE[Voice] All right dear. [At the same time] Sure thing, dear. DIANE[Voice] Come on, honey. You have to show your machine at some place this morning. WAYNE[Voice] I know, honey. [At the same time] Sure thing, dear. DIANE[Voice] And would you turn that thing OFF!!! WAYNE[Voice] Sure thing dear. [In the middle of 'Dear', the voice slows down, and stops] 

[Diane enters this room, and carries on eating and cooking] 

NICK[Entering looking v. v. tired] What's all the noise ? AMYDon't worry, Nick. It's just Mom and Dad. NICKOh. Gran and Granddad's party. DIANEWhy does everyone keep commenting on that ? NICKMom, what is with your eating dry cereal ? ADAMYeah mom. Was it something we said ? 

[Wayne enters and looks guilty at Diane] 

WAYNESorry honey. DIANEWayne, you have a very important meeting today. It could make you famous. And you're already LATE! AMYI think dad's already famous after shrinking us, blowing Adam up, and shrinking you mom. DIANESpeaking of shrinking you, where's that boyfriend of yours ? He's coming too isn't he ? AMYI'll get Russ now. [Exit] NICKSo dad, are you nervous ? 

[Wayne has fallen to sleep in his chair] 

NICKDad ? Dad ? DIANELet me be of assistance. WAYNE!!! WAYNE[Waking up] Sure thing, sorry honey. DIANEMarch into the bedroom, and change. WAYNEBut I haven't had my breakfast yet. DIANESo ?! 

[Diane exits pushing Wayne with her] 

ADAMSo, you see Nicky, That's what I've been living with all these years. NICKYou poor guy. I thought they were bad when I lived with them. 

[Amy enters with Little Russ Thompson] 

AMYWhere's mom gone now ? NICKUpstairs. AMYShe told me to get Russ. And now she's not here! RUSSNot to worry, I need some breakfast anyway. [Goes to get some] NICKSo, can he whistle yet ? AMYNicky! ADAMWhistle ? He can't whistle ? Somebody answer me! RUSSAny milk here ? ADAMCheck the bin. 

[Russ Looks in astonishment and then starts eating his cereal dry, without a spoon] 

RUSSSo, what's everyone up to today ? NICKNothing I guess. I just want a break from college. ADAMI'm off school for another week. RUSSSo me and Amy both got time off work to come and visit, and nobody's got anything planned ?! NICK+ADAMYeah. AMYWell Russ, dad's got this very important meeting today and... ADAMMay I remind everyone that it is not a meeting ? NICKIt's a kind of school science fair. 

[Ad. Lib asking what that is] 

NICKOh of course. I'm the only one who's ever been in a science fair. RUSSJust answer the question, Nick. NICKIt's just that everyone has a stand, a stall, whatever you want to call it, where they show off some of their inventions, and they give a speech about it later. AMYOh yeah. I remember you winning with your 'let a robot take your dog for a walk' experiment. NICKI was eleven. ADAMWhen was that ?! AMYRuss, why are you eating your cereal dry ? ADAMExcuse me, does anyone hear me ?! RUSSI couldn't find any milk. 

[Adam sighs] 

[Cross-fade to scene two] 

Scene 4;Szalinski living room [Russ is sat on the couch, Amy is lying down with her head on his lap, reading. Adam is on the floor, playing a computer game against Russ.] 

ADAMAnd guess who won it again ! RUSSI'm tired of this game. ADAMYou mean your tired of losing. RUSSHey, does anyone want to go to the mall ? AMY[Jumps up] I'll have a piece of that action. RUSSI should have known. Adam ? ADAMI've promised to meet Heidi at the cinema later. AMYA date ? You have a date ! ADAMIt's not a date, it's just two people...you know... RUSSGoing on a date. ADAMNo, we're just... 

[Nick enters] 

NICKHey you guys, dad wants our help to carry some of his weird inventions to the…erm…car ? 

[Ad lib. Groans - Adam mimes 'thank you' to him] 

DIANE[Carrying a huge heavy box past the door] Come on you guys. WAYNE[Passing with a small 'toaster' type thing] Yeah, give us a hand. 

[They all look at each other, and in the end head upstairs into the attic] 

Cut To;The Attic [Amy, Russ, Nick and Adam enter and look around. The place is full of heavy boxes, but the shrinking machine is in the middle of the room, with an empty box beside it] 

AMYHow are we gonna get all these boxes downstairs and into the car ?! RUSSI have no idea. NICKHow many things has Dad invented ? ADAMLook around the house. Have you seen those things in a shop window display ? RUSSYour oven came from a shop. ADAMBut now it's unique - Dad has made it an oven and a dryer in one ! AMYYeah. But somehow, I don't think we'll ever see that in a shop. RUSSSo he still invents in the attic ?! NICKAnd at work. ADAMHe makes the prototypes here - if they don't work correctly, he leaves them around the house. AMYThings like the mailbox. NICKAnd anything else in the house. RUSSThe shrink ray works. How come he isn't mass producing that ?! NICKExcuse me ? Every household in America owning a shrink ray ? Think of the consequences. RUSSYeah, I guess. But still, how are we ever going to get all these Huge boxes through the door ? Not to mention down the stairs and into the car type thing your dad owns ? AMYI think that's one of the inventions which didn't quite work. RUSSBut how do your parents expect to do it ?! 

[Nick and Adam look at each other (They both have the same idea)] 

NICKAre you thinking what I'm thinking ? ADAMIf you're thinking what I'm thinking, I am. 

AMYNick ? Adam ? RUSSWhat's wrong ? NICKYou did say that the boxes were too big to be carried downstairs didn't you ? RUSSYeah, but what...You're not thinking of using the shrinking machine ? NICKThis is what it was designed for. Dad wouldn't mind. [He starts to fire her up] AMYAdam, do something. ADAMSure. If you insist. [He helps Nick] AMYWe can't do this…[Sees Russ going to help]…I might aswell [Goes to help] 

[Ad. Lib talking to each other] 

[Play some music, and show them firing the machine up, and then start to shrink stuff - Nick controlling the machine] 

ADAMThis one next. AMYAre you sure we should be doing this ? RUSSCome on Amy. Your dad will be glad of the help. 

[They carry on with their work, but then Russ and Amy set a box down in front of the machine. Russ gets out of the way, but Amy kneels down to tie her shoelaces behind the box. Nick counts up to three, and then fires. Russ sees Amy, shouts and runs to get her out of the way. Amy hears him shout. She lifts up her head to see what's going on. They both + the box get shrunk] 

ADAMOh my god. Nick do something. NICKAaaaaaa! ADAMSomething else! NICKOk. [He runs towards where they were shrunk] Come here Adam. ADAMThe machine isn't going to fire, is it ? NICKNo. There's no-one to press the button. 

[Adam walks to Nick] 

NICKWatch your feet ! [They both start looking for Amy and Russ. The machine fires up, and shrinks them. As it does, it overpowers and falls into the box, while it does, it pulls it's plug out of the wall] 

ADAMOh my god. NICKAaaaaaa! ADAMI still don't want you to do that. But that's how I'm feeling ! AMY[Running towards them] Adam! Nick! RUSS[Running with her] Not again, please not again! AMYNick. This is all your fault! NICKNo, it was your fault tying your shoelaces. RUSSSomeone should have warned her sooner. ADAMWhy didn't you ? 

[They all start shouting at each other] 

Cut To; [Outside the house. Diane is struggling to get a box into the solar-van. Wayne is empty-handed] 

WAYNEWhere are the kids with those boxes ? DIANE[Still struggling with the box] Wayne, these boxes are heavy. You can't expect Adam and Amy to carry them WAYNEThey could have brought some of the smaller inventions down. 

[Diane gives him a look] 

WAYNEI'll go and get some more boxes from the attic. [Goes inside] DIANEBut first could you just help me with… He's gone again. 

[She gives the box a huge shove into the van. There is a crashing sound as it goes in. Diane looks around, but walks into the house] 

Cut To; [Up in the attic. They are all still fighting. Then Wayne enters, they stop when he talks] 

WAYNEKids ? 

[They all start shouting at him] 

WAYNEAnyone here ? DIANE[Entering] Where are they ? WAYNETypical I guess. They knew there was work to be done, so they chickened out. DIANEWell there aren't many boxes left. They must have done some work. WAYNEYeah, I guess. Let's get the rest of them down. 

[Wayne and Diane carry 2 of the remaining 4 boxes down - one each. The kids dodge their feet] 

RUSSI'm getting Deja-vu. AMYYou're not the only one. NICK[To himself] I don't understand. No-one pressed the button… ADAMNick ?! NICK ?! NICKYeah ? ADAMIt's almost as impossible to get your attention as it is to get mom and dad's. AMYWhat are we going to do ? Dad thinks we've just gone out to dodge working. RUSSWhile we're here dodging their feet. NICKWait. They're going out to this meeting. Let's get into one of these boxes so we may get their attention there. RUSSYeah. I mean. How big can this meeting place be ? ADAMSounds good to me. Amy ? AMYI can't believe I let you guys talk me into this stuff ! RUSSThe shrinking machine. The lid's still not on. They'll have to put the lid on. ADAMSo ? RUSSSo we should climb up on the lid, it's easier and closer. 

[They all agree, and start towards the lid of the box. Wayne and Diane enter. The kids climb on to the lid (It's not high)] 

AMYRight. So now all we have to do is sit here, and wait. NICK I guess so. 

[They do so] 

DIANEWayne ? WAYNEYeah ? DIANEWouldn't it have been easier to just use your shrinking machine and shrink all those boxes ? WAYNEUsually yes. But the machine's been playing up lately. It shoots without anyone pushing the button. 

NICKHey you guys. It wasn't my fault. Dad's the reason we're shrunk. 

WAYNEOnly one box left. DIANEOne ? There are two boxes here. WAYNEYeah, I know. I'm only taking the shrinking machine. 

RUSSA quick change of plan everyone. AMYWhat can we do ? ADAMThere's no other way there. RUSSJust grab on to his shoe. 

[They all run after him as he starts to walk out of the room with the other box. They all [except Amy] jump onto the shoe. Amy is screaming after them, and barely keeping up. Russ holds his hands out. She grabs them, and is 'flying' in the air as Wayne lifts his foot to walk. Then Nick and Russ pull her onto the shoe - Fade out] 

Scene 5;In the Solar-van [Fade in. Wayne is driving, Diane in the passenger seat. The kids are still on Wayne's shoe] 

WAYNEDo you think we should have locked the house ? The kids may not have a key. DIANEAmy can always drive them somewhere. So can Nick and Russ. And there's always the Thompsons' house. WAYNEYeah, I guess. 

NICKMaybe we should make our way to the back of the van. AMYWhy ? NICK'Cause dad won't notice us here. If we climb on top of one of the boxes, we'll be easier to find. ADAMYeah I guess. RUSSLet's do it. 

[They get off the shoe, but have to battle not to be squashed when Wayne puts his foot down on one of the pedals as they try to pass it. They then see a clear run towards the boxes] 

RUSSI'll race you. ADAMYou're on. NICKHang on a sec. AMYI don't want to… RUSSOne, Two… AMY[Starts running] RUSSHey, I thought you weren't racing. AMY[Shouting back] I changed my mind. 

[They all start running to the back. They get to the middle of the boxes] 

ADAMNow what should we do ? NICKWe need to get to the top of one of the boxes. RUSSThe one right by the back door would be best. When your dad opens it up, we'll be staring in his face. 

[Ad. Lib agreeing] 

NICKAnd look. There's some string coming out of the top of it. We could climb it easier. ADAMCool. 

[They all look at Amy] 

AMYLet's go. 

[They run towards the box right at the back of the van. Zoom out so we see Wayne and Diane in the front] 

DIANESo what exactly do you have to do today ? WAYNEShow my stuff. Show people how it works. Look at other scientists' work… 

[Cut to the back box. The kids are nearly at the top. Russ is leading. He arrives at the top] 

RUSSNot far to go now Amy. AMYDon't worry. I'll be fine. I should be used to this by now. But I'll be fine. 

[Cut to Wayne and Diane] 

WAYNE…And give a speech. Oh my god. My speech. I've left it at home! 

[Wayne breaks suddenly. Nick, Adam and Amy are still on the string, it swings violently. They shout. Russ is thrown forward, but stays on the box. Wayne puts the gearbox in 'Reverse' and v. quickly reverses onto the grass by the side of the road.] 

DIANESTOP!!! 

[Wayne breaks unexpectedly. The back doors are flung open. The kids are thrown out of the car onto the grass along with a few smaller boxes and one larger one which opens, and Wayne's invention shatters and pieces go flying everywhere] 

DIANEI've got the speech in my bag. 

[Fade out, and fade back in on a car pile-up behind Wayne. Not including Wayne's Solar-Van. Cut to the kids stuck in the overgrown grass with nails and other stuff from Wayne's invention surrounding them] 

AMYIs everyone all right ? RUSSSure. We're lucky you're a trained nurse huh ? AMYYeah. But I'm lucky I didn't have to use any of the stuff I learnt on you guys. ADAMWhere's Nicky ? AMYNick ?! NICK[Running towards them] There you are. I've been looking for you. What happened ? RUSSGee, for once boy genius here can't find an answer. AMYIs everyone all right ? RUSSEveryone's fine Amy, don't worry. AMYWell, if everyone is OK, then we have to make our way back to the van. Or we'll be lost here forever. ADAMYeah. You're right. But how ? This grass is really thick, we don't know which way to go. RUSSIt kinda reminds me of something. NICKLook. How about we follow the trail of nuts and bolts. They should lead us to the van. ADAMYeah, and it can't be that far away. RUSSLet's go. AMYYeah, let's. This is like something out of a fairy tale. 

[They start walking, but they soon change to running. Zoom out, showing the whole trail of nuts and bolts (It's not very long) leading to the broken box. Zoom back in on Wayne - Picking up some smaller inventions that flew out of the back] 

WAYNEWhy me ? Why me ? Why me ?! DIANEWayne ? The policeman has said that we're free to go. WAYNEReally ? DIANEYeah. He remembered us from when Adam was blown up. WAYNEOh. Well, We'll have to pick up all this mess… DIANENo, just what we need. Here, I'll help you. 

[They start walking near to the nuts and bolts. Picking up a few things. A Policeman walks up to them] 

POLICEMANAre, erm, you Wayne Szalinski ? WAYNEYeah. What can I do for you, officer ? POLICEMANI'm just gonna need your sequence of events. WAYNEErm…sure. Ask away. DIANEWill you need me, officer ? POLICEMANI think you should stay. Just in case you can remember something that he might have forgotten. DIANELike his speech. POLICEMANI'm sorry ? WAYNELong story. Let me tell you all about it. You see, I'm on my way to a very important meeting and… 

[Wayne keeps on telling the story as it happened, Diane adding a few points sometimes. As this happens, zoom in on the grass, and on the kids. You can still hear Wayne, Diane and the Policeman talking in the background] 

AMYWait up you guys. Let's take a break. I'm out of breath. ADAMGood idea. I'm exhausted. RUSSDo you think we'll make it to the van before they drive off ? NICKWith all these people about do you think we'll make it to the van without being trampled ? AMYI hope so. I don't want to miss my favourite soap opera. RUSSYou can watch the re-runs. NICKIf we're big in time. ADAMWait a second. AMYWhat's up, Adam ? ADAMIs that dad's voice, or am I imagining things ? NICKI don't think you could… ADAMListen. [They all listen to Wayne and Diane talking to the policeman] And mom. They're close by somewhere. RUSSLet's follow their voices. We can get up on one of their shoes again, and get carried back to the solar-van. AMYI don't want to do that again. ADAMIt's either that or being stuck here all your life. AMYWe can catch tomorrow's episode, right ? NICKYeah. I think so. 

[Ad. Lib talking on the way] 

[They start walking, following the voices. Asking each other sometimes if they're not sure. After a while, Adam looks up] 

ADAMLook. There they are. Don't they look big ? AMYScary really. 

[They look at each other, and shake their shoulders (As if they had a cold shiver)] 

RUSSHey, come one. 

[Ad. Lib talking] 

[They all start running towards Wayne and Diane, and then get on Wayne's shoe when they reach] 

RUSSWell Amy, you made it this time. AMYYeah Russ. And thanks for last time. [They kiss passionately] NICKAmy ? AMY[Breaks the kiss] Yeah Nick ? NICKDon't thank me. Don't ever thank me again. ADAMMe neither. AMYSure. I'll just give all my thanks to Russ. [They kiss again] ADAM[Obviously making conversation] So Nick. How are you ? 

[Move up from the shoe, up Wayne's body to his face] 

WAYNE…and that's where we are now officer. Picking up the pieces, you might say. POLICEMANWell thanks for your time Mr. and Mrs. Stalensky. DIANEYou might find that that's Szalinki. POLICEMANWhatever. [Walks towards some other people] DIANEDo you still want to go through with today, Wayne ? Maybe we should just go home. WAYNEYou're the one who told me to be confident Diane. Have you lost all your confidence in me ? DIANEI just thought that the kids may be worried and… WAYNEThey've grown up Diane. They'll be fine. DIANEBut Adam's only fifteen. WAYNEHe's sixteen next month. Besides, the others can look after him. DIANEOf course. You're right. I worry too much. My mother always worried too much. Maybe it's in the genes. 

[As they start walking, cut to the kids on Wayne's shoe. The shoe is moving (In walking motion).] 

AMYAre you sure this thing is safe ? How do you know it's safe ? No-one's ever tested it out before us. RUSSStop worrying Amy. NICKIt's perfectly safe if we hold on tight enough. 

[Amy grabs Russ' hand. He is obviously in pain, and finds it hard to speak] 

RUSSNot to me. AMYOh, sorry. [Lets go] ADAMLet's just hope we get dad's attention this time. NICKWe will somehow. Don't worry. 

[Cut to Wayne and Diane walking towards the van, zoom out slowly, they enter the van and drive off, cross-fade to scene 4] 

Scene 6;Later in The Solar-Van [Wayne is still driving, Diane in the passenger seat. The kids are in the middle, by the gear-stick] 

AMYDo you think, if we get out of here alive, we'll get dad's attention ? ADAMI sure hope so. I don't wanna be small all my life ! RUSSDo you think any of us do ?! NICKLook. If we want to get big again, we have to work together. Not disagree and fight. RUSSYeah, sure. Sorry Adam. 

WAYNEDo you think, if I get out of here alive, I'll be able to go through with today ? DIANEI sure hope so. I don't want you to be a laughing stock all my life. WAYNEOh ? DIANESorry Honey. You'll do fine. Hey, wasn't that the turning for the University ? WAYNEI don't know… Why do you want the University ? DIANEThat's where this thing of yours is. Honestly. 

ADAMHear that ? We're almost there ! RUSSRight. Now we'll put our plan to get their attention to work. AMYWhat plan ?! NICKWe don't have a plan. RUSSI know. So how will we get their attention ? 

[Wayne stops the van, and steps out. He goes to the back to open the back door. Zoom out to see a big University behind him. During his and Diane's conversation, the kids climb on Diane's shoe, before she steps out of the van] 

WAYNEHoney, come and help me here. DIANEDo I have to ? I carried a load of stuff into the van, and now I have to take it all back out again. Life isn't fair. I'll have to put them all back in again in the minute ! WAYNEPlease Honey. I haven't shrunk anyone for two years. DIANEAnd may I remind you that I'm still not over the time you shrunk us ?! WAYNEThat was ages ago. Please ?! DIANEI give up. 

[Diane gets out of the van to help Wayne unload it. The kids stay on her shoe as she carries one of the boxes into the University and into a huge hall full of experiments, inventions and other Science stuff. She puts the box down by a tray of bottles on the floor] 

AMYDo we have to stay here all day ? RUSSYou mean on her shoe ? Nick ?! NICKI vote we get off. ADAMThe ride is too bumpy ! AMYBut what if somebody stands on us ?! NICKWe'll get on that tray over there. No-one will stand on all those bottles. And it's close to dad's booth. [He points up to a table with 'Szalinski inventions' written on it]. RUSSYeah great. AMYLet's go then. 

[As they walk towards the tray, Wayne and Diane go to get a couple more inventions. The kids climb up on the Tray Ad. Lib talking on the way] 

RUSSSo. ADAMSo now what ? AMYYeah Nick. You're the Genius who brought us here. What are we going to do here ? NICKI'll think of something now. Hey, what if we… 

[He is broken off in the middle of his sentence when someone lifts the tray that they are standing on up. They all fall down. Ad. Lib panicking] 

AMYWe'll never find our way back to mom and dad now. This is great. NICKDon't worry. We'll find them. Look, it's not that full here. ADAMYeah. I guess it's not like the public is here. 

[Just as Adam finishes his sentence, cut to a woman by the front doors. (not the same ones that Wayne and Diane came in through)] 

WOMANRight. Let's go then. [Opens the doors] Hello. Welcome to the North California Science University. We have many local scientists here today, and we hope you'll be interested in their work. 

[She lets loads of people into the hall. Cut to the kids] 

RUSSAdam, I think you spoke a few seconds too soon… 

ADAMThere are loads of people here. How are we ever going to find mom and dad ! AMYWe could. If we're lucky. NICKWell we have to find them. Otherwise we're going to be tiny all our lives. RUSSI vote for finding them. I don't really fancy being bird food all my life. NICKWell we can't do it standing here. AMYWill we dare step off this tray into a world of giants. ADAMI'm sixteen. This is not a fairy tale. 

[They get off the tray, and start to walk across a high shelf. The shelf comes to an end.] 

RUSSUh-oh. Now where do we go ?! 

[They all look at Nick] 

NICKI don't know ! You think of something. RUSSIf we had a stepladder, we could use it. AMYIf we had ice cream, we could eat it. ADAMWe can jump. NICKYou want to die ?! ADAMNo. But if you look down, there's a rail of test tubes. RUSSSo, we're going to jump into some unknown substance ?! NICKIt is a bit 50-50 Adam. AMYYeah. But there's one of those things you press to get water in and let water out on the rail. We could jump on that, and land safely. NICKYou mean jump onto a pipette ? AMYIf that's the correct term. NICKI guess that's a good idea. RUSSThen who goes first ? ADAMNot me. RUSSWhy not ? ADAMI'm the youngest… Erm… There has to be someone waiting at the bottom for me. AMYI'm the woman. I'm not going first. 

[Nick and Russ both look at each other] 

NICKYou're the eldest. RUSSYou're the wisest. 

[Amy and Adam just push both of them down onto a big Pipette. They land on the soft, squishy part, bounce, and then get off onto the rail] 

RUSS[To Adam and Amy] Ha ha. You've had your joke. Now come on Amy. Get down here. 

AMYWell, they made it. ADAMHave a soft landing. AMYOoh! 

[She closes her eyes, and then jumps. She too lands on the soft squishy part, bounces, and gets off onto the rail.] 

AMYHey, that was fun. NICK[To Adam] Hey Adam! Everyone else is down here waiting. And if you ever want to be big again… 

ADAMOk. I'm coming… 

[As he goes to jump, he slips. Ad. Lib panicking etc. He falls down towards a test tube labelled 'Acid'. The others run towards the tube. Adam has managed to hold on to the side of the tube with one hand, and is struggling to hold on. The others come right up to him and look down] 

ADAMHelp me you guys. I can't hold on… AMYAdam, don't worry. Russ ? RUSSYeah. Don't worry Adam. AMYI meant for you to pull him up. RUSSBut I… Ok. I'll try. ADAMHurry! 

[Ad. Lib more panics and 'stay calm' etc.] 

[Russ holds out his hand for Adam to hold it. Adam does so, but almost slips while doing so. They all really panic. Russ reassures Adam, and slowly pulls him up. Amy hugs him after] 

AMYDon't worry Adam. Nothing would have happened to you. NICKAre you kidding ?! That's hydrochloric acid. He would have been dissolved. ADAMOh my god. AMYNick! NICKBut…erm…you would have been fine ? ADAMThanks Russ. RUSSIt's all right. I'm used to saving your family when we're shrunk. AMYThat was really brave Russ. NICKConsidering that you could have been dissolved too. AMYNick ?! 

[Cut to Wayne showing off some of his inventions. Diane holding a mobile phone to her ear and looking frustrated in the background. After a while, she puts the phone off and joins Wayne] 

DIANEWayne, the kids aren't home. WAYNEThey're probably at Russ and Amy or Nick's college dorm. DIANENo, I checked. They've not been there at all this week, since they were staying with us. But they're still not back. WAYNEDon't worry Diane. Wherever they are, they're bound to be safe. DIANEBut I am worried. Last time any of our kids went lost, you'd shrunk them… 

[Show the kids walking right by the wall on the floor. Loads of huge feet passing them] 

DIANEI sure hope they're Ok. WAYNEDon't worry. MR. BERNWayne ? WAYNEMr. Bernstein. How are you. Diane, Mr. Bernstein was in college with me. MR. BERNI sure was. You've married a loser, Diane. DIANE[She hasn't been paying attention] I just can't imagine where they could be. I'm gonna call the Thompsons. 

[Diane goes, leaving Wayne and Mr. Bernstein talking. Cut to the kids still dodging feet on the floor.] 

AMYWhere is dad's stall ? RUSSWhere's the roof ? I can't see anything there are so many people here. NICKI'm getting chlostrophobic. 

[Adam, who's at the front of the group stops. The others all go into him. Zoom out, and see a mouse/rat in front of them, it's looking at them] 

RUSSWhat was that all about ?! NICKWhat was the point of stopping ?! ADAMDon't look up ahead ! 

[Amy screams v. loudly. Cut to a man at a booth with 'I can hear bats' written above him.] 

MANThere are bats calling in the building. I can hear them. 

[Cut back to the kids. Amy stops screaming. They look at the rat, It's looking at them.] 

RUSSAmy. I think that rat heard what you said. AMYWhat did I say that it could have heard ? 

[The rat starts running towards them. They all start shouting and screaming. They run into a small room and towards a plug in the wall, with the wire in it leading upwards to a photocopier on a desk with loads of paper ( with print on it). They climb up the wire, as the rat starts to chew it] 

AMYHurry up and climb, Adam. ADAMI'm going as fast as I can. NICK[the last of them] Hurry up! There's no grip on this wire, and I can't hold on much longer! 

[Nick starts to slip down. Ad. Lib panics. He then let's go and falls. (Show in slow motion) He lands on the rat's tail. It squirms and runs away] 

AMYNicky, are you all right ? NICKYeah. Except that I almost got eaten by an enormous rat! RUSS[Arriving at the top of the desk, standing on some papers] Hurry up and join us here where it's safe, Nick! ADAMWhoa! I never want to be shrunk again. RUSSYou might be shrunk for the rest of your life if we can't find your dad. AMYWe will find dad. We can't stay small forever. He'll figure it out somehow. 

[Nick arrives at the top and stands on the papers with the rest of them Ad. Lib 'hello's' and 'how are you's'.] 

NICKSo. What are we doing here ? RUSSI think it's a bit safer than being on the floor with rats and feet, don't you ?! NICKBut now how can we get dad's attention ? 

[Just then, Wayne walks through the door] 

AMYWell look at that. ADAMSpeak of the devil who shrinks people. 

[Wayne walks towards the photocopier, the kids all start to shout at him.He puts the photocopier on in the mains. Kids are still screaming at him. He then presses so that the photocopier will make two copies. He goes to grab the paper the kids are sitting on. Ad. Lib uh-oh's and they all hold on to each other. Wayne lifts up the paper slowly and steadily, still typing something on the photocopier. Show him with the 'Zooming in' button - changing it to 150%. The kids are screaming at him to stop. Wayne flips the paper over, the kids fall onto the glass on the photocopier. He puts the printed side down on top of the kids, closes the lid and presses 'Copy' on the machine. Show the kids under the lidwith the bright lights etc. Diane enters.] 

DIANEWayne, I still can't get hold of the kids. They're still not at our house. WAYNEDon't worry. May I please ask who's looking after my stand ? DIANEI get you. I'm still worried, though. 

[She exits, and Wayne picks up the lid to make another photocopy. He removes the paper that was in it, and the kids run off the glass, and onto the button area of the machine. They think they're safe until Wayne starts pressing the buttons again. They all, in a panic, slide down the wire they climbed up. As Wayne starts making the new copies, he lifts the two copies he made earlier. He looks terrified. Show the paper - with a quite clear, black and white, picture of the kids on it - and the printed text in the background.] 

NICKDad's looking a bit weird, isn't he ? ADAMNo more than he usually does. RUSSNo, wait. We were in the photocopier when that copy was made. Our pictures must be on it. AMYWe're going to be saved. 

[Wayne runs out of the room, the kids look quite surprised. Cut to the stand, Wayne runs towards Diane] 

WAYNEDiane. I have something really important to tell you. DIANECan it wait ? Since you're here, I don't have to look after the stand anymore, and I'd really like to try and find the kids. WAYNEThis involves the kids. DIANEDo you know where they are ?! WAYNEYeah. Ish. DIANEWell where ? I was getting almost as worried as when you shrunk them. 

[Wayne looks guilty] 

DIANEDon't worry. You know I've almost forgiven you about that by now. WAYNEThen what I say isn't that important. DIANEYes it is. I want to know where the kids are NOW! WAYNEOk, honey. But don't worry. DIANEI won't. If you don't give me any reason to worry. WAYNEOh well… DIANEWayne. WAYNEAll right. I didn't try. I kind of…I shrunk the kids. Again. 

[Diane just stares at him in shock] 

WAYNEBut you have to remember, they're older and wiser than last time. And they're a franction of a millemeter taller.. 

[Diane faints in her usual style, with her legs following after. Wayne looks around, there are loads of people watching] 

WAYNE[Nervously] She's…erm…She's…She's very tired. I have to close the stand down now. 

[He puts a 'closed' sign up, and drags Diane through the crowd, and towards the photocopy Room.] 

RUSS[In the doorway] Do you think your dad has told your mom yet ? 

[They see him dragging her] 

SZALINSKIS[Together] Yes. 

[Wayne drags Diane into the room. The rat is there again, and someone's dog. Wayne looks at Diane in a panic and, dropping her, starts running towards the dog. He stops, looks down at his feet, runs back, and gets on a sofa. He looks down at his feet again and runs out of the room. Looking back after him. Two Policemen walk towards him. Show the kids looking from time to time] 

POLICE 1Excuse me sir, but could we take a look in there. WAYNEDon't step on the floor. 

[They see Diane's body, Policeman one checks if she's breathing, and gives the Ok to Policeman 2] 

POLICE 2So. What's this. You were just going to leave her there, right ?! WAYNENo…She's my wife, officer. POLICE 2Your wife, really ?! WAYNEYeah. She fainted when I told her that I shrunk our kids again. POLICE 1Shrunk your kids ? Of course. I do it all the time. 

ADAMHe Did! NICKBelieve him, why don't you ! 

POLICE 1I believe that we're going to have to take him down to the station. POLICE 2I believe so. WAYNEBut I'm telling the truth. Look. 

[Wayne shows them the photocopy with the kids on it. The officers look in disbelief. The shrunk kids start screaming at them. The crowd which has gathered around them giggle amongst themselves.] 

POLICE 2Did you try to kill your wife, Mr…I'm sorry, what was your name ? WAYNEWayne Szalinski. POLICE 1Well, Mr. Slitzedsky, You might want to call your lawyer. WAYNEBut my wife has fainted. Look, ask her! 

[Diane is coming to herself by now. Wayne goes towards her] 

WAYNEDiane. Tell them I didn't… DIANEI hate you, Wayne Szalinski! I can't believe you did this again! WAYNELook at them, they're all right. [He shows her the photocopy, she faints again] POLICE 1So, Mr. Slitzedsky, you've done this before ?! WAYNENo…I… POLICE 2Wayne Slitzedsky, I am arresting you on suspicion of attempted murder, you do no have to say anything… 

[As the policeman carries out the rest of the speech, show all the kids, just staring up at them in disbelief, zoom out slowly. Then The policemenescort Wayne out of the building, he still pleads his innocence. Loads of people come to tend on Diane, The kids try to dodge their feet.] 

PERSON 1Mrs. Slimbendsky, Are you all right ? DIANEI'm fine. PERSON 2Do you need a drink or something ? PERSON 3Here Darling, sip this water. 

[Diane sees the photocopy Wayne showed her by her side. She picks it up.] 

DIANEIf you all don't mind. All I really want now is to be by myself. PERSON 1Of course. [She / He gets everyone out and closes the door behind her / himself] DIANEWayne! Why did you have to do this again ?! Nick ? Amy ? Adam ? Russ ? 

AMYOver here ! ADAMMom ! 

DIANEIf you're in this room, stay here. I'm going to get your Dad's magnifying glass. 

[She exits. As she does, the rat in the room starts to walk slowly towards the kids. They all look terrified and start to scream] 

AMYWait. Do you remember last time we were shrunk ? Quark saved us. NICKWe have to whistle at the dog. 

[They all except Russell start to whistle. The dog comes, and chases the rat out of the room. Just as the kids believe their troubles are over, the cleaner enters the room with a Hoover] 

RUSSUh-oh. You guys, where can we go that's Hoover proof ?! ADAMI don't know, but we have to hide somewhere. 

CLEANER[Sighs] Let's see what rubbish I clean up today. 

[She switches the Hoover on - it's one of the Hoovers with a lead coming out of it. The kids all get sucked towards the lead a little but battle, and soon are running the opposite way. The cleaner keeps moving the Hoover lead closer and closer, until Amy gets sucked. Russgrabs hold of her, but gets sucked up himself. Nick and Adam stop, and look at each other, then start running faster. Adam gets sucked up first, and then Nick gets sucked up shortly after - Diane enters] 

DIANENooooo!!!!!! [Switches the Hoover off in the mains] CLEANERI'm sorry. I was tidying up. It's my job. DIANEJust please don't. CLEANERI'll go now. [Goes to get the Hoover] DIANELeave the Hoover . CLEANERWhatever you want. [Exit] DIANENick ? Amy ? Adam ? Russ ?! 

[Cut to the inside of the Hoover. It is very dark, but you can still see the kids, with dust and stuff that could be sucked up by a Hooveraround them everywhere] 

AMYIs everyone alive ? ADAMI hope they are. NICKI certainly am…I think. RUSSHow do know ? How do you know you're not dead ?! NICKCheck your pulse. 

[They all check their pulses] 

AMYThis is stupid. 

[Adam Sneezes] 

AMYAdam, are you all right ? You're not allergic to dust are you ? ADAMI don't think so. But I've never been surrounded by so much dust before. NICKSomeone find something sharp. RUSSWhy ? NICKSo that we can cut this bag, and get out of here. RUSSMaybe this will do. AMYThat's my arm ! ADAMWill this do ? NICKWhat is it ? ADAMI don't know. I can't really identify huge small objects all that well. 

[Nick takes the object [A piece of glass maybe - it's not important] and cuts through the side of the paper bag with it. They all get out] 

AMYIt's nice to be in a dust-free zone again. DIANE[Voice echoing] Nick ? Amy ? Adam ? Russ ? ADAMThat sounds like mom. RUSSWe have to get out of this Hoover, she probably doesn't know that we're in here. NICKThe only way out is the way we came in. So… AMYI am not getting in that dust bath again. NICKIt's the only way out. RUSSFollow me. 

[Ad. Lib talking and sneezing] 

[They all get back into the dust, and into a hole at the bottom (they have to dig through loads of dust to get into it] 

Cut To;Outside the Hoover 

DIANEOh my god. How could I have let this happen ?! I must be the most incapable mother in the World. I thought the one on 'Home Alone' was bad. 

[Zoom in on the Hoover lead. The kids are almost out of it. It is like a tunnel to them] 

RUSSThank god. I thought we'd never get out of there. AMYI'm getting chlostrophobic. ADAMI'm tired of sneezing. NICKI spy with my little eye, something beginning with 'M'. AMYMfood ? RUSSI could do with some food ! ADAMMom ! NICKYeah. ADAMNo. Look. It's mom ! 

[They all run towards her screaming and shouting at her, she is looking around with the magnifying glass] 

DIANEAmy ? Nick ? Adam ? Russ ? 

[They shout even louder. After a while, she spots them] 

DIANEAmy ! Nicky ! Adam ! Russ ! You're alive. 

[They all hug. Diane reaches down towards them with the magnifying glass, and puts it straight on the floor] 

DIANEHere. Climb on. I'll get you big again. 

NICKWhat about dad ? 

[They all start shouting at her again. She puzzles at what they're saying for a while, so she puts the magnifying glass really close to her ear] 

NICK[Shouting] What about dad ? AMY[Shouting] Yeah. The police took him in. 

DIANEOh my god. Your father. Hold on. 

[She runs out of the building. The kids skid around the glass on the way. Diane gets into the Solar-Van, puts the kids on the dashboard, andstarts to try and drive the van (very dangerously) out of the car park, and away down the road] 

Scene 7;The police station (outside) [The solar van drives and parks (very hurriedly) in front of the police station. Diane gets out and slams the door. She then opens the door again after realising that she forgot the kids. She lifts them up off the dashboard, checks if they're all there, and runs into the police station - the kids having a very dangerous ride again. Nick falls off, grabbing the sides, Russ pulls him up] 

Scene 8;The Police Station (Inside) [Diane rushes in with the magnifying glass and goes to the reception desk] 

DIANEI urgently need to see my husband. RECEPTIONHello. DIANEMy husband ? RECEPTIONOh yes. What is his name please ? DIANEWayne Szalinski. RECEPTIONStarlensky ? DIANESzalinski. RECEPTIONSzalensky ? 

[Diane is about to say it again when she sees Wayne through a couple of glass doors with handcuffs on, and being put in a cell by a policeman - She runs through while the Receptionist protests] 

DIANEExcuse me officer. That's my husband. POLICE 1/2 Oh, Mrs. Stalenskie. Have you come to give a statement against him ? DIANENo. I want you to free him. POLICE 1/2You want to free your husband after he tried to murder you ?! DIANEHe didn't. POLICE 1/2I think you'd better talk to our sergeant. 

[Cross-fade to scene 7.] 

Scene 9;The Sergeant's office [Diane is sat by a desk with the sergeant opposite. Diane is still holding her hand straight to keep the kids on it. The Sergeant is drinking coffee from a mug - he puts it down on the desk sometimes] 

DIANESo you see sergeant, my husband was only trying to save our kids. SERGEANTBy leaving you unconscious in an empty room ? DIANEThe room wasn't empty, our kids were there. 

RUSSAnd one of your kids' boyfriend. 

SERGEANTOur officers stated that there was no-one in the room apart from you, Mrs. I'm sorry ? DIANESzalinski, and your sergeants wouldn't have seen our kids. SERGEANTWhy not ? DIANEBecause they're smaller than an inch tall. SERGEANTI'm sorry ?! DIANEI think my husband's machine shrinks people to a quarter of an inch tall. SERGEANTMrs. Szaliensky, are you on any medicine ? 

AMYHow dare he. ADAMDoesn't he remember the blown up baby ?! 

DIANEDon't you believe me ?! SERGEANTWell frankly, no. [He puts the coffee mug down on the middle of the desk] But I would however like to know why you hold your hand up like that all the time. DIANEI've been trying to tell you. 

[She stands up in a rage - and holds her head in both hands. As she does this, Amy, Adam and Russ hold on to one of her fingers (The hand is pointing down vertically) but Nick falls down into the coffee mug. Diane hurriedly straightens her hand again] 

SERGEANTMrs Szalienki. Please ! 

AMYNick ! RUSSDon't worry. [He jumps down to save Nick] 

DIANEYou didn't even call the Ambulance to see if I was all right. You're the one who just left me there ! 

ADAMOh my god. MOM ! 

DIANE[To her hand] Are you all alright ?! SERGEANTErm...Mrs. Szaliensky ?! [He looks unbelievingly at her] 

ADAMMom, Nick and Russ are in the sergeant's drink ! 

DIANEWhat are you trying to say ? 

[The sergeant looks at her very odly. He goes to start drinking his coffee] 

RUSSHere Nick, don't worry. NICKThis thing is no hot. RUSSDon't worry. We'll be alright. NICKIt's like swimming in...something hot. 

[They see that the sergeant is about to drink them. They start shouting in panic] 

AMY[While Adam is trying to explain to Diane] The sergeant's going to drink Nick and Russ ! 

DIANEI can't make out what you're saying. 

ADAMOh my god ! Amy, help me. 

[They both start screaming at Diane about the coffee. She gets the magnifying glass, and realizes that Nick and Russ are missing] 

DIANE[In a more serious tone] Nicky ? Russ ? Adam, Amy where are they ?! SERGEANTNo-one there after all ? DIANEOnly two. Answer me Amy, where is Nick ?! 

[She brings her hand right up to her ear] 

AMYNick and Russ are in the sergeant's drink... ADAMAnd he's going to eat them ! 

DIANEBut...[Sees the sergeant about to take a sip] No ! 

[In slow motion, show Diane running towards the sergeant, and just as he is about to take a sip of him coffee, she pushes him. The drink goes all over him, Adam and Amy fall on the sergeant's desk - along with Nick and Russ, and some of the coffee] 

SERGEANTWhat are you doing woman ?! DIANEYou were about to drink my son, and my daughter's boyfriend ! SERGEANTRight. I've had enough of this. [Storms out of the room] DIANEOh my god. Kids, where are you ?! 

[They all start shouting at her. But she doesn't hear them - she starts looking for them on the floor. The sergeant enters with Wayne] 

SERGEANTRight. You talk some sense into her. You talk some sense into him. [Exit] 

WAYNE[Starts walking forward] Honey, are you mad at me... DIANEDon't stand on the floor - the kids are here somewhere ! 

[Wayne jumps on to the desk - very narrowly missing the kids] 

DIANEAnd they might be on the desk aswell. 

[Wayne jumps onto the floor. And then onto a chair] 

WAYNEIs this safe ? DIANEI think so. But help me look for the kids why don't you ?! WAYNEBut... DIANEMay I remind you that you're the reason they're shrunk ? WAYNENo, I... DIANEYou invented the machine, didn't you ?! WAYNEYeah, but... DIANESo it's your fault they're shrunk, isn't it ?! WAYNEYeah, I guess. 

[Wayne starts to help Diane to look for the kids] 

ADAMThey're looking on the floor. We're not on the floor. AMYDon't worry. There must be some way to get to them. RUSSNick, any ideas ? NICKWe just need to get a message down to them. If we could get closer to their ears... ADAMWe could... NICKWe could give them the message. But how ?... ADAMI was going to say... RUSSIs it safe to jump ? AMYI don't want to chance that again. You remember what happened to Adam last time we tried that. He nearly got dissolved. ADAMHow about we... RUSSIs the side of the desk safe enough to climb down ? NICKI don't know. We would still have to find a way up to Dad or mom's ear. We want something that will take us straight down... ADAMHELLO ?! I know how we could do it. AMYTell us, Adam. ADAMFinally. We could use those... NICKThose paper-clips. 

[Nick points to a pile of paper-clips on a file] 

NICKWe could make them into a paper-clip chain and climb down it. RUSSExcellent idea, Nick. AMYWe're lucky you're here. ADAM[Disappointed] But, that's what I was going to... RUSSCome on, Adam. We need to start on the work. 

[Ad. Lib. Conversation] 

[Adam pauses for a while, while the others go to start working. He is disappointed. But he decides to join them. The paper-clips are huge, but between the four of them, they manage to start a chain] 

DIANEAny luck, Wayne ? WAYNENo. Are you mad at me, honey ? DIANEWhat do you think ?! WAYNEThat's what I thought. 

AMYHow many paper clips are there left. ADAMOnly all those over there. 

[Adam points to a huge pile of paper clips on a file] 

RUSSYeah. So let's get working. AMYWon't that much make it down ? NICKIt might. But we need to be safe. Just a couple more. 

[They carry on with the chain] 

DIANEThis is hopeless. How can we find them ?! WAYNEWell, we found them in thick grass once. I'm sure we can find them here. DIANEWe didn't find them. They found us. WAYNEYeah, but still... 

[The sergeant enters with a fresh cup of coffee] 

SERGEANTDid either of you come to your senses yet ? [he sees them on their knees on the floor] Obviously not. WAYNEDon't stand on the floor ! SERGEANTWhere else should I stand ?! On the roof ?! 

[Wayne looks at Diane] 

DIANENo, Wayne. We don't have time to get your sticky shoes from the University. SERGEANTLook... DIANEGet out of this office ! SERGEANTI'm sorry ?! DIANEYou have to get out. You can't walk about on the floor in case... WAYNEIn case you stand on the... DIANEWorms ! SERGEANTWorms ?! WAYNEWorms ? Yeah, Wood worms. You have a wood-worm problem. SERGEANTOh. Urgh ! I'll get out. [Exit] DIANEWayne... WAYNELet's just find the kids. 

NICKThat should hopefully reach dad's back. AMYHis back ?! NICKThey're kneeled down, looking for us. RUSSThen what are we waiting for ?! ADAMYeah. Let's get big ! 

[Ad. Lib talking] 

[They start dragging the paper-clip at the end of the chain towards the edge of the desk. They drop it on the count of three. It all falls downthe edge of the desk] 

ADAMWhoops. RUSSGreat. Nick, we forgot to tie it down somewhere ! AMYThat's just great. NICKWe'll have to just make another one. 

[There is a knock at the door. The sergeant enters] 

SERGEANTI'm sorry, it's just that I wanted to... DIANEDo anything. Just don't stand on the floor. SERGEANTCan I just grab something off my desk ?! WAYNEJust try not to stand on the floor. 

[The sergeant grabs the file off his desk, Amy falls off with a couple of paper-clips. Ad. Lib panics] 

SERGEANTI'll be back later. 

RUSSOh my god. AMY !!! NICKWe were this close. ADAMNow how can we get big again ?! RUSSAnd even if we do. Amy isn't here. 

[The sergeant exits with the file (he holds it straight to keep the paper-clips on it] 

AMYHELP ! DAD ! MOM ! 

[Amy starts crying. She pushes one of the paper-clips down off the desk - it lands on Wayne's head] 

WAYNEWhat was that ?! DIANEWhat ?! WAYNE[Seeing the pile of paper-clips on the floor] Were those there earlier ?! DIANEAmy ?! Nick ?! Adam ?! Russ ?! WANEThese must have fallen off the... DIANEThe desk !!! 

[They both stand up and look on the desk - Wayne sees a few paper clips] 

WAYNEDiane, honey. Pass me the magnifying glass. DIANEBut I'm looking. WAYNEPlease. DIANEHere you go. Why ?! WAYNEAmy ! DIANEWhere ?! [Grabs the magnifying glass] Amy honey. Hi ! 

AMYMom ! Dad ! Thank god. 

WAYNEWhere are the others, honey ?! 

AMYTHE SERGEANT TOOK THEM ! 

DIANEWhat are you trying to say ? WAYNEShout louder, honey. DIANEWHAT ARE YOU TRYING... WAYNENot you honey. Amy. 

AMY[As loud as she can] THEY'RE WITH THE SERGEANT !!! 

WAYNEWhat ? DIANEClimb on to my finger, Amy. 

[Diane holds her finger down to Amy. Amy climbs onto it.] 

WAYNEWhat use is that going to do, honey ?! 

[Diane holds her finger to her ear] 

AMYMom, the sergeant came through and took his file. The others were on the file. 

DIANE[Screams] WAYNEHoney ? 

Scene 10;The Reception [Adam, Nick and Russ are on the Sergeant's file] 

SERGEANTI'm going out for a bit, while they're in my office. Keep any of my messages ? RECEPITONSure, sergeant. SERGEANTAnd make sure those two in my office don't go anywhere until I get back. RECEPTIONSure, Sergeant. 

RUSSHe can't go out ! ADAMOh no ! NICKWe were almost big again. ADAMWe're going to be this big all our lives, aren't we. 

[The sergeant gets into his car, and puts the file on the dashboard. Just as he drives off, Wayne and Diane burst through the station door - followed by the Receptionist.] 

WAYNEWait ! No ! DIANEWayne, get in the car. [she goes] WAYNEWe don't have a car. DIANEHurry up, Wayne ! RECEPTIONWait. You can't go. I can't let you go. 

[The solar-van drives off - Diane Driving - The receptionist panics and runs back inside. She gets into the sergeant's office and puts his radio on. She grabs the handset.] 

RECEPTIONErm...Calling all cars. Calling all cars. VOICEHello ? RECEPTIONYou have to follow a weird looking van that's... VOICEWho is this ? RECEPTIONShut up and listen. Just follow a gray, weird van. It's heading for the town center. 

Cut To : [The chase between the Solar van, and the sergeant's car. Diane is pressing the car horn all the time] 

SERGEANTWhat are those people doing ? 

WAYNEHurry up, honey. DIANEWayne, he's a cop. I can't speed up. WAYNEWell hurry up within the limits then. DIANE[Keeping her eye on the road] Is Amy all right ? WAYNEI don't know. DIANEWell check ! 

[Wayne opens up a small ice cream tub - It's empty except for two sandwiches] 

WAYNEAre you OK, Amy honey ? AMY[In the box] Sure. Just, couldn't you have left some chocolate, not these jelly and cream sandwiches ? WAYNESo you're all right ? AMYApart from the bumpiness of this ride ! 

[Diane turns a corner, Amy gets thrown all over the place] 

WAYNEHold on. 

[Closes the lid, and puts the box down on his lap. It's darker inside the box now] 

AMYHold on to what ? 

[Two police-cars join the chase. Chasing after the Solar-van] 

DIANEOh, no. Now what do I do ? WAYNEDon't worry. Just keep on going. 

SERGEANTPolice cars ? Maybe I should stop. 

[The chase keeps going for a while] 

ADAM[Looking out of the windscreen] Wow ! This is better than a flight-simulator ! RUSSThat's because this is real. NICKBe quiet. We have to think of a way to get mom and dad. 

[They are thrown to the side] 

NICKBefore we die. RUSSHey. I've read about these cars. They have the horns on the steering wheel. ADAMSo ? RUSSDon't you get it ?! We could get on it... NICKAnd jump on the horn. RUSSHey ! ADAMNow you see what I have to go through. NICKExcellent idea. ADAMBut I never get credit for the idea. RUSSLet's go. 

[They start walking up the dashboard. Show the chase, then zoom up to show a police helicopter following the chase] 

DIANEWayne, I don't like running from the law this way. WAYNEWe have to go this way. This is the way the sergeant is going. 

[Diane looks annoyed. The chase still goes on for a while. Russ, Adam and Nick reach right by the steering wheel] 

[Ad. Lib Yeah ! We made it etc.] 

RUSSThank god. Now all we have to do is... NICKPut the plan to the test. RUSS[To Adam] I pity you. 

[They walk towards the horn sign on the steering wheel.] 

ADAMLet's go then. NICKAfter three... One... Two... RUSS+ADAMTHREE ! NICKHey. 

[Russ and Adam jump. The horn blows when they land. They 'high five' each other after they land. They all keep on jumping - and the horn keeps on blowing] 

SERGEANTWhat the...?! 

WAYNEWhat is he doing ?! 

[Ad. Lib panics etc. in the next bit] 

[The sergeant breaks suddenly. The tires screech, Nick and Adam are thrown against the windscreen, Russ grabs hold of the steering wheel. Diane breaks, the solar-van stops just before colliding with the sergeant.The box Amy is in is thrown off the seat, and lands upside down on the floor] 

AMYOuch. 

ADAMMy back. NICKMy arm. RUSSMy god. 

[They can see through the rear window. There is a huge pile-up behind them. Wayne gets out of the solar-van and walks towards the sergeant's car] 

WAYNEWhere are the kids ?! SERGEANTYou ?! WAYNEWhere are our kids ?! SERGEANTI don't know. I'm with the murder squad, not the missing-children squad. WAYNEThere were a load of paper-clips on your desk. And...Where are they ?! SERGEANTLook around. 

[Wayne looks around the car, the paper-clips have flown everywhere] 

WAYNEGet out of the car. SERGEANTYou have no right to... WAYNEGet out ! 

[Policeman 1 (From the Meeting) walks towards Wayne] 

POLICE 1May I see your driving license please... 

[Wayne turns around] 

BOTHYou ?! POLICE 1And, Sir. SERGEANTGet this man away from me. WAYNENo, wait. My kids are in his car, I... POLICE 1I don't see any kids in the car, Sir. And I don't see your wife either. WAYNEMy wife is over there 

[He points to Diane, she is holding the box containing Amy, she waves] 

POLICE 1But how on earth... WAYNEAnd my kids...are half an inch tall. POLICE 1Half an inch ?! WAYNEDiane, honey. Come here. And bring Amy with you. 

[Diane walks towards him] 

WAYNEDiane, honey. These gentlemen don't believe that we have kids half an inch tall. DIANEWe don't usually. Sometimes they're a quarter of an inch tall. SERGEANTExcuse me...? WAYNEShow them Amy. POLICE 1Is Amy a lizard ?! 

[Diane opens the lid and shows Amy to the officers] 

AMYUrgh! Bright lights ! 

DIANEWith all due respect officer. Amy is our daughter. 

[Policeman 1 faints. The sergeant looks in astonishment] 

SERGEANTAll right. Everyone, you may forget about Mr. and Mrs. Szalinski here. 

[The sergeant's car horn blows. Wayne and Diane turn around, and run towards it] 

SERGEANT[Walking off] I need a vacation... 

DIANEAdam ? Russ ? Nicky ?! Are you there ?! WAYNEI knew this thing would come in handy. 

[Wayne gets out a mini-magnifying glass out of his pocket] 

DIANEWhat else do you have in your pockets ?! WAYNEYou'd be surprised. 

[Wayne looks through the magnifying glass - after a bit of looking, he spots them all by the horn sign on the steering wheel.] 

WAYNEThere they are ! DIANELet me see. Hi guys ! 

RUSSWe're saved again ! NICKThank god ! ADAMWoo-Hoo ! 

DIANEHere, get in this box. There are some sandwiches there. 

[Diane holds the ice-cream tub to them. They all jump in] 

AMYRuss ! RUSSHi Amy ! ADAMWe're going to get big again. NICKThank you. ADAMWhat for ? RUSSI need food. Are these sarnies nice, Ames ?! AMYIf you like Jelly, cream and soggy bread. ADAMDad's sandwiches ? AMYYou guessed it. 

[Show Diane and Wayne getting into the solar-van, and driving off. Leaving all the cars and police behind them] 

POLICE 2They're getting away ! SERGEANTBelieve me. You don't want to mess with them. 

Scene 11;Outside the Szalinki house [The solar-van drives up, and parks on the driveway] 

WAYNESo, we're home. You're not too mad are you, honey ? DIANELet's get these kids big, and then we'll talk about it. 

[They get out of the solar-van, and walk into the house] 

Scene 12;The Szalinski Attic [Wayne enters, gets the Shrink Machine out of the box on the floor, and sets it up. While Diane enters, and puts the kids down on the floor in front of the machine] 

RUSSAmy ? AMYYeah Russ ? RUSSIf we would have been stuck small forever, I wouldn't care. As long as you were there. ADAMI'm sorry about being so hotheaded, Nick. NICKForget about it. I'll be gone in a week, you'll be the only son. Until Christmas, that is. 

WAYNEWell, here we go honey. DIANELet me get out of the way. 

[Diane goes up to Wayne and puts her arm around him] 

DIANEI love you really, honey. 

[Wayne presses the button, and the kids are blown up again] 

NICKYeah ! ADAMAlright ! 

[Amy and Russ hug, Nick and Wayne hug, and Adam and Diane hug] 

ADAMDad... DADYeah Adam ? ADAMI'm sorry about being so hotheaded this weekend. I should have realized that Nick and Amy are your kids too, and that I'm no different to them. DADYou are different. You're our youngest son. I should have realized that you and Nick were two totally different people. But whatever you like, science or sports, you're still my son. 

[Adam and Wayne hug] 

RUSSAmy, I've been trying to do this for a long time, and I think this is about the best time. Amy, will you marry me ? AMYRuss, I...Of course I will. 

[They hug and kiss] 

DIANEI've so been waiting for this. NICKWhat's that, mom ? DIANEIt's an excuse to have a big do. WAYNEWhy do you want a big do ?! DIANEWell my birthday was a month ago, and there are nine months to go 'til Christmas... 

Scene 12;The Szalinski living room (Christmas Day) [Show the decorations etc. then Adam, looking out through the window] 

ADAMMom, they're here. DIANEWayne, Nick. Russ and Amy are here. WAYNE[Voice] I'll be down now, I'm just finishing this, honey. NICKWhere are they ? ADAMOutside, duh. 

[Diane, Nick and Adam go outside. Amy is there with a pram (the baby in it is very young). Russ is struggling with loads of luggage in their car] 

DIANEAnd how's little Timmy ?! [She fondles the baby] AMYHe's fine, grandma. DIANEAmy, don't ! 

NICKHey Amy. I guess we'll go and help Russ. ADAMYeah, I'm not very good at baby talk. [Ad. Lib] [They go to help Russ] 

NICKDo you need a hand, Russ ? RUSSThanks a lot you guys. ADAMHow's fatherhood ?! RUSSTiring, Smelly and did I mention tiring ?! NICKI'm not doing it for a good couple of years. ADAMI'm not doing it for a long time. RUSSSo, are we in a wing of the house that's sound proof ? ADAMYou're in the same room as last time. Dad's just clearing his inventions from there. NICKHe uses it as storage space. Oh, and you'll be glad to know that he's set up a Szalinski sound-buster bubble around the room. ADAMThe Szalinski mark stands for 'Not yet tested but it probably doesn't work'. [Wayne comes through the front door with the shrink machine] 

WAYNEHoney, where should I put this ?...Oh Hi Amy. 

[As he says hello to Amy, the shrink machine slips, and zaps the baby and blows him up into a huge size. Nick, Adam and Russ drop what they are carrying, and they, Amy and Wayne stare in amazement. Diane doesn't realize, as she is looking at Wayne.] 

DIANEJust put it with the rest of your inventions...oh no, you shrunk them, didn't you ?...Just put them anywhere for now. Wayne, what's wrong ? WAYNEDon't get mad, honey. DIANEWhat ?! 

[Diane turns around to see what he's looking at, she has to look up to see the baby] 

WAYNEI Blew up the baby. 

[As Diane faints, cut to the titles] 


End file.
